Farewell to Curt Gowdy, Bode Miller Stinks, J.J. Redick Does Not, and Other Mumbo Jumbo Like Why Couldn't We See Barry Bonds Head Explode

The fact that nobody cares about the Winter Olympics is probably saving Bode Miller from going down as the biggest failure in the history of U.S. Olympic athletes. The guy was an overwhelming favorite to win multiple medals, and to date is 0-for-4 in his events. On top of that, he opened up his fat trap one too many times prior to the games and said all the wrong things. The lack of attention on his failings certainly illustarte the fact that more people are watching the Westminster Dog Show on tv than the Winter Olympics.

Speaking of the Olympics, speed skating may actually draw me in to watch on Tuesday night. Shani Davis became the first African American skater to win a gold medal when he won the 1,000 meter event. Great story, right? The problem is that all his temmates, especially star Chad Hedrick, pretty much seem to despise this guy more than brocolli (yuck!). I guess he is a weird dude, and on top of that he turned down a request to skate for the U.S. relay team in one of the events, which likely cost them a medal. Nothing like a fight among speed skaters on the same team to bring a little excitement into the Olympics. If I were the programming head at NBC, I would have Hedrick come out of nowhere during the 1,500 event while Davis is skating and clobber him over the head with a chair. Think about it, everybody wins. NBC's ratings go through the roof. The audience would be talking about this for years. Popularity in the Olympics would go to an all-time high. And Davis and Hedrick could go on to huge careers in the WWE. I am not merely suggesting this happen, I am begging for it.

Barry Bonds says he is (maybe) going to retire after this season, whether he breaks Hank Aaron's record for Home Runs or not. Look, Barry Bonds is one of the all-time great players, but who clearly cheated by using steroids at some points during his career. Unlike McGwire and Sosa, who were both basically useless and worthless without steroids, Bonds was one of the all-time greats with or without them. At this point in his career, he should be in the American League, where he is still one of the game's best hitters, but does not have to move. In retrospect, it is too bad they instituted steroid testing. Think about it, if they could have just let this go on for about two more years, Bonds' head would have clearly exploded one day. And that my friends, would have been a great opening story on SportsCenter, and an even better skit on Saturday Night Live. My point, I guess, is that I really do not care if Bonds plays again after this year. It does not matter if he breaks Aaron's record, because it was clearly accomplished with illicit aides.

Speaking of Sammy Sosa and Mark McGwire, if these clowns make the Hall of Fame they should just stop enshrining people. I mean McGwire had basically become a .200 hitter with no discernable skills except the occasional home run before he found the golden juice. Any writer that votes for the Hall that says there is no definitive proof that he used, after watching his embarrassing performance on Capitol Hill, is either dumber than Jim Carrey as Lloyd Christmas or does not care about the integrity of the game. Same goes for Sosa, who not only juiced but also cheated by corking his bat. These two disgust me.

If you read my Nascar fantasy draft posting on Friday and then quickly went back to forgetting that Nascar existed, I just wanted to let you know that my drivers finished 11th, 38th, and 43rd (out of 43 total) on Sunday. Carl Edwards, as I predicted, sucks. If I would only listen to myself once in a while I could avoid some of my roblems. I am happy to report that I am currently in 8th place out of 8. At this pace, I can be mathematically eliminated before the Final Four hits Indianapolis, and yes the season goes until November.

Speaking of the Final Four, J.J. Redick became Duke's all-time leading scorer last night. He has more career points than Johnny Dawkins, Christian Laettner, Danny Ferry, Mike Gminski, Grant Hill, Gene Banks, Jim Spanarkel, Art Heyman, Dick Groat, and everybody else that has worn the Royal Blue and White. This is a pretty special accomplishment. All the while, he has behaved with class and dignity, and been a model part of the best program in the country. The kid has probably maximized his ability based on sheer talent as much as any player in college hoops in the past 40+ years. Hopefully, J.J. has 13 games still to go in the Duke threads, and hopefully his last game will be a win! Redick needs 30 more points to become the all-time leading scorer in the ACC, which is unbelievable when you think about the players that have played in this conference! Hopefully he will have only a mediocre Redick night on Wednesday at Georgia Tech so I can see him break the conference record in person at the Wachovia Center on Saturday against the Owls of Temple.

The NBA All-Star game was last night. I did not even realize it had taken place until I watched Sportscenter this morning. My point, as always, is that the NBA is irrelevant.

John McEnroe won an ATP doubles title at age 47. This is an incredible story. McEnroe was the World's best doubles player for more than a decade, teaming mostly with Peter Fleming. This says two things about tennis. First, McEnroe was if anything underappreciated for how great he was/is, particularly in the game of doubles. Second, for a 47 year old to win a professional tournament in something other than golf, or bowling or pool, it just shows how bad the state of the game of tennis is right now. Bad stuff....

Rest in Peace, Curt Gowdy. It is tragic that we have gone from identifying announcing with great voices and talents like Curt Gowdy or Harry Kalas or Vin Scully to boneheads of today like Mike Tirico or Doug Gottlieb or Stuart Scott.